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Disgusting things parents do

I was thinking the other day about the gross – or at the very least anti-social things we do when we become parents… and the list is long!!

If you don’t already have kids and think you may want some at some time in the future then maybe you should stop reading right about now.

Every parent seems to be either a sniffer or a checker when it comes to nappies. Who ever thought we’d spent so much time sniffing our kids butts and peering down the back of their pants… and don’t get me started on those very brave (read: stupid) parents who do neither and instead stick a finger down the back of a nappy. Eeuw.

Then, when your baby has a blocked nose you have a few options – personally I prefer saline solution – but when things are dire your choices are either a horrible bulb shaped suction device (gross), or sticking a piece of muslin across your kids nostrils and using your mouth as a suction device (even more gross).

And how about the classic ‘spit face clean’. I used to cringe when my mother did this and now I find myself doing it to my kids too. Even when wet wipes are within easy reach I end up licking my finger and using it to wipe my kids chocolate/dirt covered faces.

The one thing I just can’t bring myself to do is to eat my kids pre-chewed/sucked food (hubby however has no such qualms). If there is no bin in sight I will hold a half chewed sandwich/lolly for many kilometres before I would EVER eat it myself.

*Edited to add… when breastfeeding there’s also the boob weigh/squeeze. You know, where you do a quick check to see how full they are or remember which you fed from last. Unfortunately I find myself doing this a few times a day while at work. My colleagues must think I’m very odd. Some kind of pervert πŸ˜›

What are the worst things you’ve found yourself doing?


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19 thoughts on “Disgusting things parents do

  1. Sophie on said:

    You know, five babies and I haven’t once suctioned out their noses! I’ve heard about other people doing it and it always seemed such a strange thing to do.

  2. ROFLMAO at the boob weigh/squeeze!!!
    I do that ALL the time!
    So glad Im not the only one πŸ™‚

  3. Always enjoy your blog and seldom comment. This one is a pearler though … thanks πŸ™‚

  4. We’ve also never done the nose-suction thing. Also, I don’t think I’ve used spit-cleaning… I doubt I produce enough spit to clean The Spawn (Sometimes even wet-wipes don’t cut it). I do sniff butt though πŸ˜€ And, like you, I can’t eat pre-chewed foods.

    I can’t think of anything to add to your list… but that is probably just a blissful case of selective memory LOL

  5. Gag at the muslin nose sucky thing… We learnt it was easier to dunk his head in the bath water – he cleared it himself lol… (please don’t tell Cyfs!)

    I used to do the boob-weigh and the lift and dust crumbs out of the maternity bra thing.

  6. Yes, yes and yes done it all bar the snotty nose thingy although my hubby’s uncle does it with his mouth all time without muslin and it makes me gag just thinking about it

  7. I will spend all day at work today wide eyed in horror at the thought of anyone sucking anything out of anyone else’s nose with their mouth.
    It’s your fault if I don’t get any work done!!

  8. Oh Bwahahaha! I’d completely forgotten about the boob, weigh, squeeze… πŸ™‚

  9. all over the boob, weigh.. πŸ™‚ (I think my weird habit is checking that you have actually fastened the dropcups. I have gone whole DAYS with the cups unclipped.)

    My grandma did the stinky kitchen sponge on the face. I have caught my mom doing that to my kids…BLeck!

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