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Credit: Cathy Thorne

Why do people think its necessary to scare the crap out of pregnant folk?

On a friend’s facebook wall today she said that she is overdue, had just been for a scan and that they were estimating baby to be quite large. So I respond that scans aren’t usually all that accurate and that my kids were both much smaller than estimated so not to worry about it too much. Hoping that she’ll relax a little – because she really doesn’t need the stress right now!

And because scans are notoriously inaccurate, and because big babies don’t necessarily mean anything when it comes to how hard/easy birth will be.

But of course “well-meaning friends” have jumped in with horror stories about how much bigger their babies were than estimated and other encouraging words like “ouch!” and “wholey moley heck!” (no points for spelling either). It really annoys me.

I wish when someone spoke to pregnant woman they’d keep their info/responses thoughtful, encouraging and most of all kind. Because it is not kind to reel off horrible birth stories and comments about how enormous she is. And if what you are going to say includes the words “watermelon” please reconsider and save it for once the baby has arrived.


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5 thoughts on “Scaremongering

  1. It also works the other way… At 10 days over I went to get my eyebrows done and was chatting to the beautician. She asks about my plans for the weekend. I answer “Hopefully having this baby” and she says “You’re pregnant??” I wanted to punch her right on her perfectly made up face.

    But yes… jokes about size or pain are not good. They can get you punched or facebook blocked for being an insensitive douche!

  2. I agree! I told the exact same thing to my friend today who is due in a couple of days, she was worried about the size of the baby and I said that the size of the baby doesn’t make birth harder or easier, it’s born HEAD first so not much of a difference.

  3. Cheryl Mac on said:

    Repeating horror stories is just not on. A friend of mine commented once that she would have loved to have had the birth experience that I had, but her head was filled with such horror stories about birth that she dreaded the whole birth experience.

  4. I really think that we are our own worst enemies, we perpetuate fear and dread which are not good for birth. and the more horror stories we hear and the more scared we are the worse our own births go and so the cycle goes on.

  5. People suck, that’s just it. I’m with you on this one!

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