A few snaps of the kids from this afternoon…
So, two big milestones this week for our family this week:
1. Yesterday we enrolled the Diva in school. When we were first pregnant with her I remember seeing little girls walking to school, in too big uniforms with their hair beautifully plaited and thinking “wow, one day I’ll also have a little girl on her way to school”. At the time it seemed so far in the future – to me it represented the dream of having children. And in a few short months it’ll be my little one heading off to school. She loved the visit we had yesterday and the school seems to really value children’s creativity so it will be a good place for our smart, funny, imaginative girl!
2. And then, today is DestructaBoy’s 1st birthday! Its a bittersweet moment, bitter because he is growing so fast and I was hoping time would pass more slowly with him being our last baby, and also because its days like today that remind us how far away from family we are. Our baby is 1 and none of our family members have met him yet. Just saying it hurts. Best we focus on the ‘sweet’… what a blessing this little guy is! People I know spoke about how hard the transition from one to two children is but we’ve had the opposite experience, this little boy is so laid back, just a charming, smiley little guy that fits in with whatever is going on around him. Very much a boy he doesn’t crawl, he gallops, and he’s recently discovered climbing so he’s clambering up on anything that stands still for long enough. Happy birthday my Angel!
LatteJunkie tagged me in her Q&A post (thanks Cyndi!) and I’m always game for these things so here are my answers…
Which living person do you most admire, and why?
Richard Branson – I like his entrepreneurial spirit and his attitude
When were you happiest?
05 August 2010 – 01 December 2010. I was on maternity leave with DestructaBoy and though the financial stress was rough on the family I loved every minute of being home with him. I was completely selfish and spent loads of time doing nothing more than enjoying my baby. Bliss!
What was your most embarrassing moment?
Most recently, the Diva very loudly exclaiming “Mommy, why is that lady so fat?” about a woman well within earshot (and also, NOT fat) and then following it up with “I think she has a baby in her tummy!” while I was trying to shush her.
Aside from property, what’s the most expensive thing you’ve bought?
My first NZ car – a charcoal grey Suzuki Swift – loved it!
What is your most treasured possession?
My iPhone? My books? My PVR?
Where would you like to live?
Somewhere closer to family, less wet than NZ but with the same safety, better job opportunities and closer to the rest of the world so that travel is cheaper.
What’s your favorite smell?
Love the smell of vanilla
Who would play you in the film of your life?
In my wildest dreams – Natalie Portman. More reasonably, Nia Vardalos.
What is your favorite book?
Only one? You must be joking! American Gods by Neil Gaiman, or The Dark Tower series by Stephen King, or She’s Come Undone by Wally Lamb, or The Time Travellers Wife by Audrey Niffenegger, or Tandia by Bryce Courtenay, or Jitterbug Perfume by Tom Robbins… far too many to choose from.
What is your most unappealing habit?
Cutting my toenails in the lounge whilst watching TV
What would be your fancy dress costume of choice?
Whilst I have some curves I wouldn’t mind doing a Bridget Jones…
What is your earliest memory?
Swimming with my sister when we lived in Durban – in one of those horrible old fashioned Bentley Belt things
What is your guiltiest pleasure?
I’m not guilty about most of my pleasures – maybe the cookies and cream icecream I have most nights covered liberally in melted caramello chocolate
What do you owe your parents?
Oooh, hard question. I owe my mother an unmeasurable amount of love and respect. When I was a teen I *knew* that raising us under the circumstances she did was hard. But as an adult working and trying to make ends meet for my own family I have a much greater understanding of the pressure she was under and the sacrifices she made to get us through it. The repercussions for her will be permanent and I hope that I will be able to look after her when she needs it.
I owe my father love for who he is, not who I grew up wishing he was. I owe him forgiveness. And I owe him thanks for the easy relationship we have now and the loves we have in common that make it an easy relationship (things like good food, books, music, technology… )
To whom would you most like to say sorry, and why?
What or who is the greatest love of your life?
My family is the greatest love of my life – I cant imagine life without any one of them
What does love feel like?
Love feels like a well-worn pair of favourite shoes. Like Sunday afternoons reading quietly, enjoying each others company but not needing to talk. Like ‘couple-speak’ where single words or phrases make sense only to you and no one else understands what’s so funny. Like a shared history that goes back far enough that you no longer remember what life was like before you met.
What was the best kiss of your life?
None of your business.
Which words or phrases do you most overuse?
Will you just give me one minute
Would you like a time out to go with that attitude?
You have two choices…
What is the worst job you’ve done?
Web design at a small family business where the boss used to throw telephones at employees and kick stereos through windows when he was in a bad mood (and pay rises were so small they were given as coins in an envelope, you know… because “to give you more would put you into the next tax bracket and you’d actually end up with less money”… only we weren’t paid enough to qualify for any tax bracket at all).
If you could edit your past, what would you change?
I’d live in a foreign country before settling down and having children.
What is the closest you’ve come to death?
Not applicable. I don’t remember ever being in any sort of accident, have never so much as broken a bone (besides my coccyx on a balance beam and whilst I may have felt like I was dying I wasn’t ).
What do you consider your greatest achievement?
Emigrating in a very short timeframe and emerging with our relationship intact
When did you last cry, and why?
Last night when DestructaBoy woke for the 5th/6th/7th/8th/9th time.
How do you relax?
Reading, blogging, hot baths, watching mindless TV programs.
What single thing would improve the quality of your life?
A bedroom for DestructaBoy.
What is the most important lesson life has taught you?
To just keep doing the next “right” thing
So, on to you, I nominate…
DestructaBoy absolutely worships the Diva, following her around the house (in a slow but steady leopard crawl) and killing himself laughing whenever she does something different/repetitive. And the Diva thinks he’s pretty awesome too. She’s happy to go to great lengths clowning around to amuse him and loves showing him off to anyone near enough to be subjected to “This is my brother. Look at my brother. He’s a baby boy. He’s so cute and chubby. This is my DestructaBoy. Do you have an DestructaBoy? I have a nice DestructaBoy. he’s my brother”… repeat).
When we were kids we alternated between being best mates and trying to kill each other (damn near successfully a few times). Now that we are adults I get on brilliantly with my sister but haven’t spoken to my brother in many years. We’re too similar and its all just too hard. I know our estrangement is uncomfortable for the rest of the family – although hopefully easier now that we live on different continents and they can pretend its due to distance .
I’m so enjoying all the sibling love in the house and I am dreading the day when they decide they can’t stand each other – it feels inevitable.
Do you get on with your siblings?
When the Diva was a baby she was allergic to soap and we used some pretty expensive organic washes and creams, this time round I was hoping we wouldn’t have the same issue… and sure enough we don’t, except DestructaBoy has excema so again we have to be cautious about what we use with him.
I wasn’t up for buying loads of different products until we found one that worked this time so we’ve been bathing him with aqueous cream and using it to moisturise. Its horrible stuff that leaves globs in the bath and is hard to get out of his hair.
I’ve been using them on both kids for a week with no signs of any problems and DestructaBoy’s excema has been nicely under control. I will admit that I’ve been using rather a lot of them myself as well!
My favourite is the Aveeno Baby Wash & Shampoo which smells divine and allowed my kids to have a very rare bubble bath (I know… very wasteful to use 1/4 bottle on a bubble bath but well worth it as a treat). I’m using the Aveeno Baby Daily Moisture Lotion on the kids every day and saving the Aveeno Baby Soothing Relief Moisture Cream for DestructaBoy’s excema areas… and my legs after I shave
Off to run another bubblebath!
Post a Day 2011 recently asked “what keeps you up at night?”.
Besides DestructaBoy, the thing keeping me up at night is worrying about finances. Money is tight!!!
The cost of living has risen so fast in the last couple of years and I think like most people our income just hasn’t kept up. I really don’t know how people are managing. We are budgeting our butts off and still not quite getting through
We haven’t yet traded in our cars for bicycles or sold our furniture on Trademe but some months it feels like we’re fast approaching that point.
What’s been keeping you up at night? (and how are you getting through the month?)
What a crazy weekend we’ve had!
My lovely relaxed happy-go-lucky little boy morphed into a grumpy grinch and spent friday, saturday and sunday crying or wailing. A high temperature and lots of drool meant we suspected it was teething related and sure enough one tooth has just broken through with another pressing against the gums. I am not looking forward to the rest of this teething thing if its going to be like this for every tooth. And if anyone has any advice (short of keeping him medicated for the next few months) please share.
It seems to be the month for birthday parties with the Diva being invited to at least 2 every weekend for the next few weeks (see I’m not a fan of birthdays). This weekend one of her old friends from daycare #2 had her 4th birthday party at the beach which was really nice! My very odd kid ignored the cake and dived into the fruit platter (she definitely does not get that from me!), all was fine until an hour or so after we got home when she turned slightly green, left the room and regurgitated all the fruit onto the rug in the hallway. Blegh!! She kept getting sick for the rest of the day and I was a bit worried we’d have to cancel her party… luckily she woke up on Sunday morning a little pale and withdrawn but otherwise fine.
Diva woke up on Sunday and was led outside with her eyes closed. When she saw her gift, a very large trampoline she stood silent for a few seconds and then said “woah!…” like she couldn’t quite believe it was there. Then she thought it was just for her party and we explained that its hers and its staying. She’s been on and off it ever since and its made her quite popular with the neighbours kids too!
Sunday afternoon was party time and I think we’ll be doing all future parties at a venue, it was the best party ever. She and her friends from daycare had an amazing time! They got to dress up, were entertained by 3 or 4 fairies, had a treasure hunt, decorated cookies and had feast at a table laden with cupcakes, cookies, pizza and other goodies (none of which were made by me) and all the adults could sit and chat with a drink and some food, or join in the fun with the kids. Ivy cottage rocks!
I know having a party with only daycare friends was controversial with friends and family but it really worked out well for the kids and at the end of the day I wanted the party to be all about the Diva. Next time we may consider doing a separate barbecue to share the day with family and friends as well if time and finances allow but I’d always like to keep the school/daycare party separate.
Here are a few pics from the party…
DestructaBoy is 6 months old. Already. I’m shocked at how fast time has flown! I’ve been trying so hard to hold onto every precious minute with him, knowing that this is our last baby and suddenly its been 6 months
It feels like only yesterday we were sitting waiting for a heartbeat on a scan. Only yesterday we were handed a scrunched up wrinkly little boy covered head to toe in fine white fluff. Only yesterday we were wondering what we’d call this little guy who had arrived before we’d been able to pick names.
What an amazing little boy we’ve been blessed with. He’s such a relaxed happy baby, really easy-going with a smile for everyone and a mischievous giggle. He’s fitted into our family perfectly and I cant wait to see how he grows over the next 6 months.
lying with my precious baby safe in my arms
can’t think of anywhere I’d rather be.
If I could stop time, this would be the perfect time, the perfect place.
It’s been 5 months since I last slept for more than 4 hours in a row. And those 4 hours were a gift, usually DestructaBoy wakes every 2 to 3 hours.
It wasn’t unexpected. The Diva didn’t sleep for longer than 40 minutes for a very long time (so this could be seen as an improvement). But it doesn’t really make it easier.
When I am sleep deprived the first thing to go is my sense of humour. I have a very short fuse and I don’t lose my temper, I don’t argue, so I end up simmering… radiating displeasure. My family mostly knows better than to mention it. Anyone who tells me how their child slept through at 6 weeks, 8 weeks, whatever, is asking for their own special voodoo doll (and I have many, many wakeful hours to poke pins in it).
Next to go are any decision-making capabilities which is a b*tch when you’re a project manager, I’ll tell you that much for free. Drupal or Joomla? PMBOK or Agile? Left or right? Beach or park? Apples or oranges? The smallest decision will be greeted with a blank look. I don’t have the mental capacity to choose between anything no matter how inconsequential. I imagine this can be quite frustrating for everyone around me. Not to mention that I walk around looking like a complete tool for a major part of the day.
I’m trapped in a sleep-food cycle. Only able to concentrate on these two most basic needs. Until I get a good night’s sleep I cant even begin to focus on anything else. I am plodding through each day just putting one foot in front of the other and clinging to the knowledge that one day he will sleep. One day I will sleep. It can’t go on like this forever, right?